Week 38

Hello Family...
I don't know what to write about. I've been a little sick the last
couple days. :D But I'm feeling much better now.
There are many ups and downs in the mission... mostly ups :D but this
last week we had a couple downs. One of the families we've been
teaching decided that they aren't interested anymore in listening to
us... but it's okay. They have their agency. I hate agency, haha.
Joke lang, I am very grateful for agency :D
I've been learning a lot about myself these past few weeks... it's
been challenging in a way... because I still am trying to figure this
out. I had a conversation with Sister Harvey the other night. I was
telling her about how I didn't feel like I could be myself here on the
mission. My music, sports, clothes, etc. was the way I expressed
myself! It was my personality I felt like. Before my mission, I
thought I had discovered myself. I knew who I was. But here, I've
been rediscovering myself. Sometimes here I feel like I'm so
boring... I don't have the same things I had before and I'm definitely
not doing the same things I did before. She told me I was right!
When we go on a mission, we make sacrifices, but we continue to learn
about ourselves and find a new person within us. When we go home, we
will become yet another person because we will be doing different
things. There was nothing wrong with who I was before my mission, but
I need to accept the fact that I can't be that person here. I need to
figure out who I am - as a missionary! What have I discovered about
myself? What has changed? I'm still trying to answer these
questions... it's deep. I know my understanding and appreciation for
a lot of things has deepened... but I still haven't embraced a "new
me." I still feel like part of "me" is missing. Of course I still
have the gospel, which has always and will always be an important part
of me and who I am, but what of my personality? Haha, it's
interesting. :D Maybe I'm not making any sense. It's not a bad
thing... it's just confusing. I of course am still smiling, still
happy, and still working hard. Always :D
Mom, I love love love your idea about the cabin thing... fyi. When I
come home, I support you 100% and will do whatever I can to help out
:D
I continue to use my talents here. I was asked to sing for our zone
meeting this last week. We didn't have a piano or anything... so I
just sang acapela which was probably boring, oh well :D I also
continue to play the piano in sacrament meeting every Sunday. I enjoy
it.
I love you all. Never forget it. :D
Sister McClellan