Week 69

yay, we had another baptism! Brother Vicinte was finally baptized and he was more than ready and excited.  It was so great when he shared his testimony and almost started crying.  And the best part... Brother Romeo, our other recent convert was the one to baptize him.  It was a great opportunity for brother Romeo to exercise his Priesthood and serve God and his friend.  It was a super happy day. :D  And I'm excited to see both of them continue to progress in the gospel and have them accept and magnify important callings in the church :)

After that we had a Branch Family Home Evening.  We actually had several investigators attend which was awesome! Denmark, Jr, Ofelia, Sister Delacruz, Katkat, and also many members and recent converts as well.  It was so much fun! We gave the lesson and the games for everyone and the relief society provided some good food for everyone. I'm so proud of this branch. :D  

So.... I have some sad news (for me) but it's okay, really!  I believe it's meant to be, haha. There was a mistake in my request to extend and so I will for sure be going home in October. That's just way too soon!!! President Aquino told me after Zone Conference on Wednesday that he did everything he could and the final answer was no. :(  So... yeah! I'm just praying now that I don't get transferred because that will be my very last transfer and I really would love to stay in this area and help all my progressing investigators with baptismal dates! I want to stay and see them all be baptized! Transfers are just 2 weeks away! :(

The mission is seriously the best thing ever. I'm pretty sure that I say that every week, but I'm not kidding. I don't want any of you to think I'm just writing the good stuff and keeping the other stuff quiet... because I really am enjoying every minute of my mission. I heard someone say once that if someone says that their mission was really the best two years, they are lying... but I don't believe that's true.  So far... this has been the best 16 months of my life. :D I'm sure there will be other times in my life when it gets better... :D but so far.... oh man.  It's all good!!! :D I have nothing bad to say about it right now! haha.  And it's not just because we had a baptism... even when no one's accepting the message, it's great... as long as we're doing our best. :D

Oh, this morning our district went to the zoo!  It was pretty cool! It didn't have any big mammals or anything... mostly just birds and fish and cats and dogs... which was actually kind of sad... but there were some ostriches and some spotted deer creatures... and some dead snakes... and some live ones... it was great! hehehe. :D

ummmmmmm..... I really want to be writing more of my spiritual experiences... so this week I'm making it a goal to keep track of all of them so I have a more spiritually uplifting email to send next week, haha.  Because they are happening all the time... I just have a hard time recalling them...

oh, and I have lots of pictures to send, but earlier when I started this email, there was a brown out, so we only have a little time now before our FHE tonight... so you'll have to wait until next week. :D Sorry!!!

so anyways, love you all and I look forward to seeing you all again... don't worry, I'm not getting trunky yet... just excited, haha.  :D

halong!

Sister McClellan

Week 68

We had a wonderful week this week!  Our Zone Training Meeting went well and we were able to think of some fun activities to do with all the missionaries. Wednesday we went on exchanges for training purposes and I went to City and stayed with a sister there, Sister Ili, who is Samoan.  She is awesome and it's cool because she almost looks Filipina.  Some people are surprised when she starts talking because she has a unique accent.  It's nice in City... but I'm sure glad that my area is Oton, haha.  City is sooooo different!  The people are super nice and everything, but I like all the fresh air and fields and ocean that I've been lucky to have in all my other areas. :D

So, we're super excited about the next few weeks.  We have baptisms scheduled for every week!  This Saturday is finally brother Vicinte who is super prepared and excited.  Then next Friday will be brother Reynaldo! yay!!! and then the next week, two young men, Denmark and JR, who are both awesome and I'm sure they will both become wonderful missionaries some day.  We have several others scheduled for the month of September as well.  This work is super exciting!!!  

I don't know if I mentioned this already, but if you remember, in Antique I had an investigator, brother Freddie who is deaf and didn't know how to sign or read, but was coming to church every sunday.  Sister Aurelio and I had some fun trying to teach him the lessons. Well, I was recently informed that he was baptized!!  that's so exciting!  I don't know if he learned to sign or read, but I'm glad he was finally able to be baptized because I know he's been wanting to for a long time.

I can't express how much I love this gospel.  I know that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is the only true and living church on the face of the earth and I know that this is true because I have received a witness from the holy ghost on many occasions. I can't deny what I have felt and know.  I know that God lives and loves each and every one of us and He is closer than we sometimes think.  He is watching over us and I know that if we continue doing the things that we know we should, we will be able to live with Him and our families again someday.  If we don't... we won't.  It's so simple.  And I know it's true.  I know Jesus Christ is my Savior.  My knowledge of His Atonement for me is what drives me to work my hardest every day here in the mission field and what encourages me to continue to strive to become like Him.  I love Him.  And I know He loves me.  And... that makes me happy! :D I don't think I've ever felt such joy before for such a long period of time... I would feel joy like this after a day in the temple or after a great personal study or devotional or something, but this joy has been with me for the last 16 months and it keeps growing brighter and brighter :D.  It's an indescribable feeling! :D  service is a key to happiness, I totally recommend it to anyone who ever feels anything other than joy :D

Love you all!

SIster McClellan

Week 67

Why is it that I'm always like giddy happy whenever I'm writing these emails? Anyways... I'm just SOOOOOOOOOOOOO happy right now! Life just couldn't get any better right now!  I've never had so many investigators come to church. We had 10 investigators plus several children and others who aren't yet investigators.  Our sunday school class was overflowing and I was fighting back tears of joy, haha. (I'm still fighting back tears of joy just thinking about it, haha) Our recent convert, brother Romeo passed the sacrament yesterday which was so wonderful to see.  And brother Reynaldo is completely over his Word of Wisdom problem and for the first time, his wife accompanied him at church. He's been praying (and maybe fasting) so hard for that.  Hopefully the two of them will be able to be baptized together on September 7th. I am so happy and so excited for them.  Goodness, this mission just keeps getting better and better!  We also have found several new investigators who have cars and are excited about us coming back and sharing more.

I also had an epic spider-killing experience.  I've seen 3 or four giant spiders in the last few days... one of them was in our house... and it was huge and was carrying a huge egg thing filled with babies.  I tried to kill it with permetherin, but it escaped and I ended up just hitting it with the empty bottle and the egg exploded and baby spiders went everywhere... they all died in the spilled permetherin.  It was pretty gross and I couldn't get the image out of my mind for hours... at least I got the whole thing on video... :)  You'll see it when I come home, haha.  

Let's see... what else happened... tomorrow, Sister Peralta and I will be giving a training in Zone Meeting again... so please pray for us, because we aren't quite prepared yet, haha.  We've been having a few sleepless nights trying to come up with good ideas.  It will all work out, but prayers would definitely be helpful.

Today I was talking to our Mission President, President Aquino and he asked when I was going home.  I said December, and he looked confused... he said he thought he had seen me on the October list... I explained what had happened and he was like... well would you like to extend? I said yes please! And he said he'd work it all out, so I'm super excited... I almost lost my chance to stay! And I didn't even know I was still on the October list.  So... yay!!! I get to stay to see all the changes that will be happening in November! 

The mission is. the. best. No regrets. It's full of excitement and joy and love.  I think that's one thing I've learned the most about here on the mission. About love. How to love and how to show love for others and for God.  I've even gained love for myself :D  how to accept love from others... it's become easy to love.  Even when others are doing palakpat things or when they are so different... it's easy to love them.  I've learned more about God's love and every day I learn more.  Love is so important and it's awesome!. :D  I love you all!!!! 

Sister McClellan 

Week 66

something's wrong with the keyboard. i don't know how to fix it, haha. anyways...

this week was really crazy! i was really sad to see sister butler leave but i know she was excited and ready to go home, so of course i'm happy for her.  but because she left me on tuesday morning, and transfer meeting wasn't until friday, i didn't have a companion for three whole days.  i was very lucky to have a member work with me so i didn't have to be in a threesome with the other sisters. it would have been fun but i wouldn't have been able to help the investigators in my area!  so this member, sister ilona, is waiting for her mission call and we got it worked out where she could even do studies with me and plan with me and sleep at our house... so she really got to see what missionary life is like. i'm excited for her!  so friday was transfers and i was asked to do a musical number... i did something that i've always wanted to do... haha.  i'm not sure if it was really allowed in a meeting like that, but no one said anything... i got the other sisters in my zone to sing with me and we sang come thou fount... and during part of it i did a little beat boxing... just a nice soft beat, nothing weird... i thought it sounded nice... it got a lot of smiles from the elders :)  hehe.  so my new companion is sister peralta.  she is from manila and is turning 28 this month.  but she looks younger than me, haha.  she is a very skilled missionary and i'm excited to work with her.  she's very sweet and i've enjoyed these last few days with her!

so brother reynaldo... goodness i love him so much. so, shortly after he got a priesthood blessing from our branch president a few weeks ago, he started improving dramatically in his word of wisdom.  every day he was going down... from 10 cigarettes a day to 8 to 6 to 4 and then he got seriously sick. after he got a blessing last week for his sickness, he went to the hospital the next day.  he stayed there for a couple days. when he came home, he was feeling much, much better and he said he's pretty sure he's completely overcome his word of wisdom and it won't be coming back.  it was really hard on his body stopping his addiction all of a sudden, but through the help of priesthood blessings, he was able to do it quickly. once he got sick, he never had another cigarette.  his sickness was actually a blessing! i really admire his faith and his determination to stop, despite how hard it was.  i've had many investigators who have expressed the desire to stop their addiction, but i've never met someone who tried so hard so quickly to stop.  usually the response is amat-amat lang. or it will take some time... and yeah, they really want to stop, but he really put forth action and exercised his faith and we were able to see a miracle.  in just a few weeks, he has completely overcome his addiction. and his sickness is gone. he came to church yesterday with a smile on his face.  i think he'll be ready for baptism on his scheduled date, sept 7. :D  now he and we are all praying that his wife will soften her heart and accept the gospel as well.  she keeps saying that she will someday, but something is holding her back... she's procrastinating... so we would appreciate your prayers as well :D

congratulations mom and dad that you were chosen to extend your mission! that's awesome! i was hoping i would have the opportunity to see you guys as missionaries there in nauvoo. i also will be extending. so i will be coming home in the very beginning of december, i'm not sure the exact date yet. wow how time flies! part of me wishes i could stay here forever... and part of me is starting to feel ready to go home, haha.  i have a feeling that when the time comes, it will feel like the perfect time. :D

i love you all soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much and i pray for you all every day! and i am soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo excited to spend the rest of my life and all eternity with you so make sure you all stay worthy! okay? we are coming into some crazy times with lots and lots of temptations... it's going to become harder and harder to be a member of this church... the work is hastening... on both sides... satan does not want the work to progress... of course we know the work will progress whether he likes it or not, but we can't let him get to us.  we have to stand strong... 'be steadfast and immovable, always abounding in good works.' that means ALWAYS!  so get up and get to work!!! today! :D love you all!

sister mcclellan

Week 65

Hey Everyone!

This week was amazing! Probably the best yet of my whole entire mission! :D  Our investigator, Brother Romeo... has been listening to the discussions for a couple of months now and hadn't been able to make a decision or recognize an answer.  The week before his scheduled baptism came and he had to finally decide whether or not he wanted to be baptized.  Even though he still wasn't sure if it was true, he decided he liked what he was hearing and was willing to make those covenants with God and endure to the end... so he qualified for baptism.  When our district leader interviewed him, he could tell that Brother Romeo is still a little confused about some of the doctrines, but he said "well... the spirit says he can be baptized."  That made me feel a whole lot better.  If the spirit says he can be baptized, I don't need to worry about it.  The last lesson we taught before his interview was about revelation and the scriptures and we explained to him that there are errors in the bible and showed him some Joseph Smith Translations... I felt like I just told a little kid that there was no Santa.  But he took it well... and he believes that everything we are sharing is true.  The day of his baptism, he was super nervous... he was also super excited and was not turning back.  He was baptized by President Aquino... his special request... which is very rare... but an awesome opportunity.  When he came out of the water he had a great big smile on his face and afterwards he had the opportunity to share his testimony.  When he stood to share his testimony, he just looked like he was glowing.  He was SO happy!  He didn't share that he knows the church is true or that Joseph Smith is a true prophet, but he shared his experience about having to make a decision and about just wanted to find the truth and find happiness.  And I think he has definitely found the happiness he has been searching for.  Yesterday, he received the gift of the holy ghost and was interviewed to receive the aaronic priesthood.  We are very excited for him and admire his faith.  I have no doubt he felt the spirit a lot these last few days and we just need to continue to help him recognize that those feelings and that happiness he feels if from the Holy Ghost that is witnessing to him that this really is the way to salvation. :D  I have no doubt he will gain a true testimony over time and that he will become a great strength to the church.

 

Our other investigator brother Conrado, was also baptized Saturday.  He is amazing as well and although medyo old, he will also be a great strength to the branch.  He is very poor, so we're just trying to do our best to make sure he has a way to come to church every Sunday.  He's wonderful and funny.  He was a little confused when asked to share his testimony... he stood up, folded his arms, and began to pray... oops, haha.  The Branch MIssion Leader helped him out. :D  We love him. And I am just so happy!  

In Sunday School, the man who started the debate last week was there again... and he was at it again.  We watched the Restoration DVD and I'm sure that everyone, including him, felt the spirit.  Afterwards, this brother started saying how it was a work of man and that the catholic church is God's church, but he says he believes that this church is also true... he kept contradicting himself and just wouldn't listen.  Luckily, we had a member from the stake come and got him to be quiet for a few minutes and allowed several others to share their testimonies and what they felt during the video.  I was very proud of all the other members and investigators in that class who shared.  Everything they said was out of love for this man and for God and everyone shook his hand after class.  Of course I want this man to continue to come to church, but part of me is a little worried about what other things he might say that could confuse our other investigators.  It just made me happy to hear all the others defending the church and I know their testimonies were also strengthened through this experience.

Our investigator, Brother Reynaldo, who is more than amazing, was not able to come to church.  We had heard the other day from his wife that he was sick so after church we decided to stop by and see how he was doing.  He really did not look good at all! Apparently the had gone to the hospital earlier that day.  We started to explain about priesthood blessing to his wife because she wasn't there when he received one to help with his Word of Wisdom, and just as we began to explain to her, Brother Reynaldo who was lying on the couch with his eyes closed began nodding and said he would like one.  Ah, his faith is so strong!!! :D  We called our branch president who said to call another brother who lives close by.  We walked to his house and he was so willing to come with us even though he wasn't sure how and I think it was one of the very first times to give a blessing of healing.  He was nervous, but it was a beautiful blessing and afterwards, Brother Reynaldo immediately looked a whole lot better and started chatting with this member and smiling.  It was amazing! I love the Priesthood. :D  That member ended up working with us the whole rest of the night and he was amazing and I could see that the experience really strengthened his testimony as well.

I am so grateful for the gospel in my life.  I know that it is true.  I know that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is the only true and living church on the face of the whole earth and that if we live by its teachings until the end of our lives, we will fulfill our purpose here on earth and return to live with God again and receive a fullness of joy in his presence.  I know that the Book of Mormon is the word of God.  I know that Joseph Smith is a true prophet of God and that through him, the Church that Jesus Christ himself established, was restored to the earth.  I know that if we don't endure to the end... and if we don't keep the commandments... we will not reach our full potential and will be miserable.  We taught a less active man the other day and really just explained it to him very simply.  Sister Butler and I called that lesson "Operation POS Smackdown."

We shared Mosiah 2:36-41 and I think he understood.  He came to church for the first time since I've been in this area and I think he intends to stay and finally fulfill his calling... we've been struggling without him for a while.  His calling is kinda important... :D  The work is hastening... we can't afford to waste time or go astray.  We need to continue to hold fast to the iron rod and press forward.  If we don't, we'll fall and it will be too late to come back.  Anyways... I love you all so much!  And you are all amazing!  And... I am so lucky to have such a great family.  I can't express how much I love you all.  And I can't express how much I want to live with you all again for eternity. hehe. :D

BYE!!!!

Sister McClellan

 

 

PS HI! This is Sister Butler. I'm Sister McClellan's awesome companion. I'm just adding a bit on here...because I want to. So I have a request for all of you. I know that you LOVE Sister McClellan SSSSOOOO much...and I know that it would be just awesome if you would SHOW her your love by sending her a HAND WRITTEN letter by the end of August.  None of you are exempted. Each of you (little children included) should send her a letter. It would mean the world to her and it would make her very happy. Please do it. :) Thanks! you're all awesome! I love you...even though I don't know you. :) Have a great day!
 



At the baptism

 

 

My district
 

Week 64

Good Afternoon! (Is this a normal greeting? I can't remember...)

This week was great! Tuesday we had the BEST Zone Meeting I can ever remember... probably because Sister Butler and I were the ones teaching... we were definitely inspired. We had been trying to think of ideas for a week beforehand but ideas weren't really coming until the day before.  We fasted and prayed and the revelation started to come.  We decided to teach about faith to move members in seeking the upper class.  We created an awesome analogy about an airplane emergency and had all the missionaries act it out... we prepared a long room, with chairs aligned and numbered like in a real airplane and taped face masks to the bottom of every chair.  It was an awesome analogy... if I do say so myself.  We had emergency exit personnel who had additional assignments taped to the bottom of their chair. President and Sister Auino were the pilot and co-pilot.  We gave them instructions and passed out peanuts and began out flight.  A few seconds into the flight there was an emergency... the airplane started to lose pressure and all the passengers needed to put on their oxygen masks and they only had 30 seconds to do so. Each missionary however had a color on their chair that determined whether they were an adult or child.  The children could not put on their own masks... and the adults had to first put on their own before they could help anyone else.  The trick was... that some of the masks were either missing or broken... it was up to the emergency exit personnel to follow their instructions in helping their fellow passengers to either retrieve new masks from us, the flight attendants, or to help them fix their masks.  It was awesome.  3 people died in that emergency... which was perfect.  No matter what the conclusion was, it would have made for a great discussion.

So, I guess I'll explain what each thing means... The flight attendants (me and sister butler) were representing all the missionaries.  We are trained and know what everyone needs in order to be saved... and are equipped with the tools in order to do so.  The Emergency Exit Personnel represent the members... they know the people around them and what they need and are able to help them get what they need.  They were given special instructions in which they could work through us to help the others.  And they are SO important!  The adults represent the upper class... who have the ability to help others once they have been saved themselves... and the children represent the lower class... who are just as important as everyone else and also need to be saved... but can't really do as much in building the kingdom of God.  In our analogy... there were a whole lot more children than adults, which is accurate for here in our areas.  We have been encouraged by our amazing leaders in the church to seek the middle and upper class, people who can really help build the kingdom of God... and once the church is strong... everyone else will much easier be able to live the gospel.  As it is... when all the members don't have enough money to get to church, they can't really hold a calling, and the church doesn't get any stronger.  (D&C 58:9-11)

Anyways, it was an awesome training and we had an amazing discussion afterwards where the missionaries came up with even more amazing insights about things that happened in the activity and about things that they have been seeing and experiences they have been having in their individual areas.  Participation in meetings is amazing and really brings the spirit.  I am so grateful for God's help in this and in our work every day.  I really had a good time!  

I had a really cool experience yesterday at church.  We miraculously had 7 investigators at church!  We were hoping for about 15.... but it's okay... 5 of those were potential priesthood holders and they doubled the elders quorum class, haha.  Anyways, in our gospel essentials class, the topic came up about whether God has a body of flesh and bone or if he is just a spirit.  It became quite the debate and the branch president got involved and then President Aquino even came in and shared.  Our investigator Romeo, who will be getting baptized this Saturday was still confused about this issue and he wasn't sure what to believe... he was sharing all these scriptures from the bible that proves God is just a spirit... he doesn't know yet about JS Translations, haha.  I know though, that you can't prove anything with the bible... there are errors in the bible! You need an additional witness. The situation was starting to get kind of intense, and I could just feel something welling up inside me... I knew I needed to say something.  I raised my hand and waited to be called on... I don't know why, but my heart was pounding so hard and I felt really hot and shaky... when I was finally called on, I just shared my simple testimony of the restoration of the gospel and the church and about prayer in order to know the truth for yourself.  I never felt the spirit so strongly.  The classroom got quiet again after that and soon ended. I will never forget that experience... My testimony of the restoration of the gospel increased a ton with that experience.  Even though I've been testifying and teaching about it for months, this time it was just a little different.  It felt good. :D

There are a lot more things that happened this week... we went on exchanges which was super fun, lots of great new investigators, getting soaked again from rain... opportunities to serve and more.  I love missionary work SO much!  I will never ever ever regret this chance that I had to come here to the Philippines and serve these people and God for 18 months.  It is the best thing ever and I am learning SO much!  I will never be the same again.

I love you all.  Take care always.  Choose the Right.

Love,

Sister McClellan 

 

 

Week 63

This week I learned about the power of reading the Book of Mormon.
We have an investigator, Brother Conrado... he is 70+ years old and should be getting baptized on July 27. He is really poor and sometimes has a hard time coming to church because he doesn't have any money to pay for transportation. He is a fisherman and sometimes he doesn't get any fish... so it's a hard life for him... but we recently saw a change in him. He came to church 3 times in a row. We always follow up on his reading when we visit him and he's been reading the Book of Mormon every day... sometimes for hours on end. After he's been reading the Book of Mormon, his faith is so strong and he's sure he wants to be baptized and that everything will work out. Last week he didn't come to church because he didn't have any money and when we asked him how his reading was, he said he hadn't read since the last time we had visited him which was several days before. He also said he wasn't sure about his baptism because of course he wants to be able to keep his covenants by coming to church every Sunday and he just wasn't sure he could. We taught him a lesson about faith that day and encouraged him to continue reading the Book of Mormon. When we went back to him later that week, he had read 30+ pages!!! and he was like... I'll find a way to come to church because God will provide a way. He went to go fishing Saturday night... his last chance to make some money. We were praying for fish!!! When we got to church yesterday and saw him sitting there, we were overjoyed!!! We asked him if he got some fish and he said none. We haven't followed up to see exactly how he made it to church, but I definitely know that God provided a way because of his faith and he
did everything he could to be there. And reading the Book of Mormon really increased his faith.

Our other investigator, Brother Reynaldo... is amazing. We are so excited for him. He just has a word of wisdom problem. He recently got a priesthood blessing to help and he said it's helped. He's been coming to church as well and is really doing well. When we asked him about his reading, he said that when he's reading the Book of Mormon, he has absolutely no desire to smoke. He forgets that he has that problem and says he just feels peaceful and happy. When he's tempted, he remembers to go and read the Book of Mormon and it's been really helping him a lot. There's power in reading the Book of Mormon. I know that is true. We had the opportunity of teaching an active family recently about missionary work and showed them how to give a Book of Mormon away. We had them practice on each other. We gave each of them a Book of Mormon and had each of them commit to give them away to a friend. I'm excited to see what happens. :D Even the little girl who's like 7 years old committed to give it to her best friend at school. It was so cute and when she practiced on me, she even shared the cutest little testimony about how the Book of Mormon helps her in her life and said that it would also help her! It was adorable! Sister Butler and I decided we would also do the same thing. Neither she or I have ever just given away a Book of Mormon before... I did once in high school I think... and here, usually it's part of a lesson when we introduce the book, so this was new to both of us. We wrote our testimonies inside and  marked some of our favorite verses and wrapped it and just gave it as a gift to a couple who works at the fruit stand by our house who we've offered to visit before but they don't have time... so hopefully they'll at least have time to read!

I love the Book Of Mormon! It's really my favorite book ever! And the more I read it, the more I LOVE it! How blessed we are that we have it. I hope I never take it for granted ever again. I wish I had more time to read it! I only have 1 hour a day for personal study and I spend most of that time preparing for the lessons that day and only have a short time to actually get some good Book of Mormon reading in. Of course I'm super grateful for this hour that I have... but I would sure love a little bit more time!!! :D And more time outside proselyting as well. We have a very good problem! We have so many investigators with baptismal dates! ha ha. We've stopped extending dates recently because we are encouraged to visit investigators with baptismal dates three times a week, and we just don't have enough time! We aren't trying to find new investigators at the moment... but somehow they keep coming! It's great! We got 11 new investigators this last week without even really trying! It's been crazy, ha ha. We've been focusing on getting our lessons shorter, but still effective and spirit-filled in order to have more lessons in a day... but in our area, there's a lot of walking no matter what, so we still can't have as many lessons in a day as we would like to have. It's a challenge... but a good challenge. :D

Anyways... that's about all that's going on with me right now! Thanks everyone for your love and support and prayers. I'm discovering more and more the power of prayer. Please include also my investigators and branch in your prayers... oh and also our zone meeting this coming Tuesday because Sister Butler and I will be doing an EPIC training for all the missionaries. Thanks! :D Love you all!

Sister McClellan